Motivation

I am a member of Cyclo Core, it is an internet based cycling club and for me is a font of information. Today there was a great podcast that spoke about many of us not fully committed to change. In this case, the change was doing the work, the drills etc necessary to become a really good cyclist.

I thought about my obstacles, my excuses and realize that all of my excuses are just that..lame and perhaps the reason I have not seen dramatic progress in this and indeed other area of my life, is that I hesitate.

1) My weight. I know all it takes to fix it, and yet at times I still sabotage. I could lose 15 lbs which would improve my cycling. Why do I keep that extra weight? What purpose does it serve, other than to reinforce my feelings that I am not up to it?

2) My fear of cracking. When I am really pumping and pushing, I will sometimes stop just short of pushing myself beyond what I think I can do. Deadly for making improvements

Biking is a good metaphor for life. I believe we keep problems alive because they serve as an excuse. "I could ride faster if I was lighter" or " I never pushed myself". Likewise in job situations, I have found excuses and not seriously tackled them.

The question I must ask myself is DO I WANT TO LIVE? Do I want to cycle or play at it, do I want to continue my work as a psychotherapist or dabble and dream.

Dabbling, and dreaming, and half training does not satisfy me and leaves me feeling anxious and waiting for 'more'. It is like a drug craving, you always want more but cannot have it. I always desire and yet at the same time and starting to realize that my very fears and excuses are what is hampering my progress,